What To Do If You Feel Taken Advantage Of

Being taken advantage of can feel disappointing. For a lot of people, but especially for those who tend to consistently make efforts to help others, being taken advantage of is frustrating. Nevertheless, most who struggle with being taken advantage of usually also struggle with putting an end to this.

It is not a personality fault if you help people and enjoy doing that. The problem arises when this occurs too often and/or becomes too burdensome on you. If you feel you are being taken advantage of then there are things you can do to stop this or at least control it to make it less difficult.

Here’s what you should do if you feel you’re taken advantage of.

1. Don’t be a people pleaser

Being a people pleaser is one of the main underlying reasons why many end up being taken advantage of. A habit of doing what is in the best interest of others (even if at the expense of your own interests) increases the possibility that someone will eventually take advantage of you. There are many ways to stop being a people pleaser. Try to deal with this in order to be able to prevent being taken advantage of moving forward.

Read: How To Stop Being A People Pleaser

2. Set clear limitations

In order to avoid being taken advantage of you should define what that entails to you. Consider what you are willing to tolerate, how much you’d be inconvenienced and what your sentiments are towards a situation. Consider these to determine what is too much. Any situation where you feel you are being taken advantage of should be out of the question –this is your limit. You have to make these limits clear to yourself so you can uphold them. Then a big part of upholding them becomes saying no, which brings us to our next point.

3. Say “no” if you need to

Once you know what your boundaries are then your next task should be enforcing them firmly. This may be difficult for some people who generally struggle with being more assertive, but it is possible to build this skill up. It is important to refuse a request that goes beyond what you are willing to tolerate.

Do remember, though, that just because it feels like someone is taking advantage of you does not mean they actually mean to do so. Make sure if you are saying “no,” you do so politely but firmly (especially if this is only the first time or first few times you reject someone).

4. Practice being firm

This is important particularly if you aren’t used to being in situations where you need to stand up to someone. Try practicing what your approach would be. Practice ways to say “no,” ways to refuse requests, ways to deal with any convincing someone might try to do in order to get you to do something. You can train in front of a mirror or with another person you trust. Practicing can help create more confidence in the actual situation.

5. Try avoiding certain situations

This one is not always possible or easy but it is something you can consider if you feel that it’s an option. Certain people may have a habit of going too far with what they ask for. Avoid them if you can. Maybe you go somewhere and constantly get assigned tasks. Avoid that place, if possible. Learn to recognize patterns and avoid when you can. Is it always possible to steer clear of every unfavorable situation? No, but taking control whenever you can is a good choice.

6. Strengthen yourself

Building strength (emotional and mental) means building self-esteem, independence and an ability to refuse a request firmly. A lot of times it is people with low self-esteem who are taken advantage of. It’s often people who lack confidence in themselves that are more likely to be in these situations. Carry yourself in a way that shows you are willing to stand up for yourself and refuse a request. When you refuse something, make sure you exude a natural confidence. This doesn’t mean being arrogant, just confident and firm.

Moreover, build the mental toughness to be able to say no. Learning to say it is one thing, but having the natural ability to let it out is something you should build from the inside out. When you toughen your personality up you are less likely to be taken advantage of.