How To Stop Being A Narcissist: 5 Powerful Ways

What is a narcissist

A narcissist is someone who is overly self-involved and obsessed with their own physical appearance, achievements, and power. They have an exaggerated sense of self-importance and will often take advantage of other people in order to further their own interests. Narcissists tend to be manipulative and often lack empathy for others. They typically believe they are superior to others and have an excessive need for admiration and attention.

Ways to stop being a narcissistic person

If you feel that you fit the definition of a narcissist then consider these strategies to stop being narcissistic.

1. Identify and deal with narcissistic tendencies

If you think you are narcissistic and you want to stop then congratulations, you have successfully passed the first step. The second step should be to identify your narcissistic tendencies and control them. Identifying these tendencies means recognizing narcissistic thought patterns, traits, or mannerisms. Try to pay attention to things like entitlement, exaggerated self-importance, belittlement of others, obsessions with power or attractiveness, a hyper-fixation on your own accomplishments, and/or poor reception to criticism. If you notice these or any other similar traits associated with narcissism, try to combat them. Give them a few seconds to flow and allow yourself to feel them but make sure you then bring yourself back to reality.

2. Combat narcissistic thought patterns with more grounded ones

If you feel yourself fixating on your own accomplishments, stop yourself immediately and challenge them my reminding yourself that you should continue to put in effort to do good things and that other people are also accomplished. There is room for more than one accomplished person in the world. Challenge your obsession with attractiveness by reminding yourself that external beauty is only skin deep and being a decent person counts equally and even more so. Learn ways to view criticism more receptively rather than viewing it offensively. The goal here is to try and humble yourself by countering narcissistic thought patterns with more humble ones.

3. Pay attention to how you treat others and be kind

The way you treat others is the most important thing to notice about narcissism. Yes, it is unhealthy to constantly obsess over things that may not even be all that important. But how you treat others as a result of your thought patterns is also significant. If you struggle with relationships, this might be the reason. You need to start your positivity within and let it flow outwards. Don’t feel like you are better than other people but also let that mentality show. Make it clear that you genuinely view others as equal to you. Don’t show an obsession with superficial stuff. Demonstrate and feel humility and be kind and empathetic to others.

4. Accept criticism and feedback in a constructive manner

Criticism may not seem fun but it is actually important. Feedback allows us to look inward and find areas of improvement we may not have noticed on our own. Think about it, wouldn’t you rather your friend told you were doing something wrong than hearing it from a complete stranger who points it out. Most criticism actually comes from love. Even when it doesn’t it really shouldn’t be offensive to you because getting criticized is normal. Reframe criticism to allow yourself to accept it more easily.

5. Realize your worth without being self-absorbed

Just because narcissism is itself not a favorable trait and being self-absorbed can actually be a bad thing doesn’t mean self-confidence is the same. Realizing your worth means having the ability to know that you are valuable and you can do something in/for the world. No human has more value than another and it is important to keep this in mind but also remember you are special and valuable in your own unique way. Focus on your individuality (which is something to be proud of) without superiority.