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How To Stop Being Jealous: Ways To Control Jealousy

image with two papers where the one on the right is smiling and the one on the left is frowning and appears to be looking over at the one on the right.

Jealousy is a burdensome emotion. Yes, it can often be useful for pushing and motivating people to do great things, but it can also harm peopleโ€™s mental health when it gets out of control. At the same time, some may find it difficult to watch people succeed, get the things they want, have money, be attractive, or whatever else. Sure, people come with all types of thought patterns and some people just do not feel jealousy as easily as others, but still most people do feel jealous at least once in a while.

To a certain extent, you canโ€™t blame yourself if you feel jealous but you also should not allow feelings of jealousy to obstruct your enjoyment of life. If you feel that jealousy is causing you distress in any way, it’s time to look into ways to control it.

Ways to control jealousy

If you feel jealous too often or you just want ways to decrease feelings of jealousy, try these strategies.

1. Use jealousy to better yourself

One of the worst things you can do with jealousy is to allow it to just build up or worse yet make you do something that takes you back in life. Donโ€™t do anything foolish if you get jealous. Instead, if you feel jealousy what you should do is harness the passion that comes from it and use it to improve yourself. Jealousy can really make you do great things because people who are jealous tend to be energized and empowered to act. The problem is people usually either act wrong or donโ€™t act at all. If your efforts donโ€™t yield the desired results you wouldโ€™ve ay least improved yourself and you have something to carry with you as a win.

2. Remind yourself that jealousy is normal

It may be a silly feeling but it is a common one nonetheless. Thatโ€™s right, jealousy is felt by many people and if you are one of them then you are in good company. This doesnโ€™t mean you should just sit back idly as your jealousy consumes you without trying to control it. All this means is that you should keep yourself aware that if you get jealous it is normal but you can begin to move on and recover from it.

3. Humble yourself

Humbling yourself doesnโ€™t mean sitting there and inducing self-loathing. It means understanding who you are and who you are not. You should strive to understand that you are a lot like everyone else in the world and they are a lot like you. Does the person with a few extra bucks in their bank account really have that much importance in the grand scheme of things? People are very close to each other in value no matter how big the difference may seem to us. Yes, you should be humble but everyone else should be as well. The only difference is really whether people will humble themselves as well.

4. Remind yourself of your worth & be grateful

Did you do something (no matter how small) that you are happy you did today? Are you living yet another day? Are you able to find happiness even in something minute? If your answer to any of these is yes then sorry to break it to you but you have worth and something to be grateful for. Find something that you feel gives you value no matter how small you may think it is and be grateful for that. Always remember that there are people who wish for what others might take for advantage. Be appreciative!

5. Avoid situations that induce jealousy

If you notice a pattern in things that make you feel jealous and you are able to avoid the situation(s) then there is no reason for you to be there. Itโ€™s understandable that not every situation is avoidable but many are and if you can avoid then do so. Maybe you notice a significant other is constantly speaking in a manner that makes you feel jealous. Consider discussing with them and if you donโ€™t see a change reconsider your relationship. Maybe you compare yourself to people at work in the lunchroom. Consider different conversation topics that are not likely to induce jealousy.

6. Donโ€™t place importance on silly things

If you are jealous, the reason is probably not as important as you make it out to be. Things like grades in school, performance at work, how your significant other might view you are all important, yes. At the same time, they are not the most important things in the world. If someone performs better than you in areas like these it is normal to be disappointed but it is not normal to exaggerate their importance.

If you are under the impression that you should be better than everyone then you should reassess the standards you have placed on yourself. Ultimately, it is these distorted thought patterns that can cause jealousy. Give everything you do your best and whatever happens is what it is. Life is so much bigger than some of the little stuff people tend to place a lot of importance on. Take it easy.


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