How To Cope With Being Ghosted

In these modern times with so much fancy technology, getting ghosted is a common thing. The emotional flood that strikes after being basically ditched can get some people down for quite a while.

But, if it happened to you, take comfort in knowing you aren’t the only one (it’s pretty bad out there).

What does it mean to be ghosted?

Being ghosted means someone abruptly ended a relationship with someone else. The relationship ended with communication suddenly stopping and no explanation for leaving.

While someone who ends a relationship suddenly but by communicating might cause hurt, it technically isn’t ghosting unless they don’t communicate at all with the other person. The relationship basically just ends when someone is ghosted.

How do you know if you’re getting ghosted?

You may not see getting ghosted coming. Someone may give signs that they’re about to ghost you, but the reality is signs may not be given. They can also be subtle if there are any.

Getting ghosted is often an unexpected surprise.

Signs that you may get ghosted

Signs that it’s possible you’re about to get ghosted include someone being more boring or “dry” to talk to – they aren’t very entertaining or fun like they used to be. They may take on a new attitude towards you that is anywhere from bland to rude. They may take longer to respond through messaging and they may not initiate conversation as much or at all.

It’s important to remember, though, that these signs are not a guarantee you’re going to be ghosted. They’re just indicators that it’s possible a good old fashioned ghosting is coming.

They can mean other things too, so it’s important to investigate first and not jump to conclusions.

What do you do if someone ghosted you?

Getting ghosted can cause a significant amount of emotional hurt but recovery is possible.

If you’ve been ghosted, you may be wondering what to do next.

So…

How should you handle being ghosted?

There are many things you can do if you’ve been ghosted to help yourself move on with your life.

Here are 5 ways to deal with being ghosted.

1. Remember someone you belong with wouldn’t have ghosted you

Think of the ideals you want your partner to have for a second. Is ghosting you one of those ideals? If it is, uhh… why?

You can compromise some things for someone who you really like and get along well with. But this isn’t one of those things you should compromise.

Most people don’t dream of being with someone who would ghost them. Finding someone with decency and respect is a minimum, not a plus.

You need to genuinely believe that you deserve better than a ghoster. You might like the person and get irritated by what they did, but liking them doesn’t mean you should be with them.

Anybody can ghost, but somebody who does it shouldn’t occupy space in your mind. You deserve better.

2. Don’t expect decency (from anyone)

Ghosting is not decent. Some people do it because they don’t know better and some people were just plain indecent. In either case it doesn’t matter. Expecting decency from anyone in life is a mistake.

You can’t force everyone in the world to be a nice person to you. Anyone can behave in an indecent manner and people don’t really owe you decency. Life is full of nice people, bullies, neutral people, and the list goes on.

People will act the way they act – that’s not your business. Living your life peacefully is your business. Being okay with however people treat you is a good way to find happiness in life regardless of what others do.

3. Accept

Being ghosted may not have been fun but it’s what happened. You may not like it but this is the path your relationship with that person took.

There are really few options in your situation and the best one is acceptance. Acceptance can help you come to terms with what happened and begin the healing process.

Don’t give this situation any pushback. It is what it is. Accepting it is really what’s best for you. There was probably a time when you didn’t know this person and you were doing just fine. Go back to that time.

You don’t have to like what happened, but you can accept it. Turn it into nothing more than data in your mind. Accept it so it becomes neutral like any other basic day-to-day aspect of your life.

4. Let yourself feel and move on

A lot of emotions might go through your mind if you’ve been ghosted. It would be nice to feel nothing but most likely you’ll feel something (if not many things).

Realize that this is normal and healing is possible. No matter how hard the times may feel, you need to remind yourself that you can improve.

Don’t resist emotions and don’t agitate them. Simply let yourself feel them. Let them come and go. Allow yourself the chance to process what happened and move on.

If you need to dedicate some time in your day to sit alone and just process your emotions, do so. Take some reflection time to talk it out with yourself and think about how you’re feeling. About 20 minutes should be enough here but if you need a little more or less, take it.

5. Don’t seek closure

It’s normal for a lot of people to want closure when they go through heartbreak. If this is you, stop. There’s really no good reason why you should be seeking closure.

What’s the point? Closure is overrated. Sure it might help in some situations, but many times knowing why someone left isn’t going to help with the recovery process.

What would you really gain from closure? The person left and that’s it. Move on. You got closure when they left without saying anything. Their silence was enough closure. Their silence is reason enough to move on.